bayconbit:

concernedresidentofbakerstreet:

r0dents:

fireflufferz:

sigh-asdfghjkl:

andrewhussiesbosom:

[9th grade voice] ugh 8th graders

[8th grade voice] ugh 7th graders

[7th grade voice] ugh 6th graders

[6th grade voice] haha ‘penis’

[5th grade voice] *gasp* you said penis

[College voice] haha ‘penis’

meladoodle:

i regret everything i ever do approximately 3.8 seconds after doing it

babyferaligator:

drunktrophywife:

babyferaligator:

how much do friends cost

$420.69

ok but how much with this coupon i got 

the-fandoms-are-cool:

darrynek:

hey kid wanna see a magic trick *reaches behind your ear* ready? *rips your ear off* where’d it go

I’m so mad you didn’t say “where’d it van gogh?”

xthe-technical-lyoko-warriorx:

squiderpy:

squiderpy:

I forgot my name was “bitch I might be” on Skype and called a friend

I’m gonna cry if this keeps getting notes. Pleas not another 1k post.

ooc; HAHAHAHAHAHAH OHMYGOD.

pearls:

pearls:

i touched a dick once and it was the scariest thing in my life because it had a really cold head and i don’t know it wasn’t fun

sometimes the ‘i’ and ‘u’ shouldn’t be so close on the keyboard 

imawanchor:

dylanofryin:

actual picture of actual one direction fans 

it’s like a scene from a zombie movie

greekgogurt:

do you ever look at someone you used to be good friends with and cringe

alanfeels:

they are not my classmates

they are people within my class whom i hate

they are my classhates 

tardisity:

The oldest person alive was born on April 19, 1897, meaning that April 18th, 1897 was approximately the last time the Earth was inhabited by an entirely different set of people and if you don’t think that’s the realist shit ever then you can get right on outta town.

iwillfucknepeta:

pimpeta-slap:

mrv4n1ll4m1lksh4k3:

pimpeta-slap:

Who came up with kissing? Seriously?
Did 2 people one day accidentally bash heads together and went like, “Oh… That was nice”
*violently bashes head together again*
“This should be a thing”

kissing is a method of exchanging saliva (and thus DNA) to determine whether or not you would want to reproduce with that person

*Bashes heads once more*
You are a prime candidate for my child.

hallloween:

me at sleepovers